Iam bound and determined to start to use this blogging for myself. I have found myself alone at the cross roads of being what most would call letting go. I have spent 25 years, 1/4 of a century, and close to a thrid of my life trying to do things the correct and proper way. I have reached great mountains and valleys of dispair as I have tried to people please all my life and now I have reached my limit physically andemotionally. Where as I have spend every moment trying to remember all the have toos and filling in as others blythly went elsewhere. I am now lying that I have completed things and spending great lengths of time dreaming of running away, even from those that I love. Inded it is those same people that have presumed upon me for much too ladder and expect that their choice is what will be and have never chosen the oppisite or picked up on one social clue.
I am terribly angry about the positions I have found myself in, even to today.
So I expect I will find myself here sharing as much of my art as possible and I am afraid that the dream of Mississippi Lake has to be posponed until after it is impossible for us to go anywhere.
I have this new little computer and I mean to learn how ro keep financials straight and a journal of what was accomplished and a calender of things to come.
This is venting for me. I am 53 years old and it iss time to take a sabatical for me.
Thanks for listening.
Yours J
