Iam bound and determined to start to use this blogging for myself. I have found myself alone at the cross roads of being what most would call letting go. I have spent 25 years, 1/4 of a century, and close to a thrid of my life trying to do things the correct and proper way. I have reached great mountains and valleys of dispair as I have tried to people please all my life and now I have reached my limit physically andemotionally. Where as I have spend every moment trying to remember all the have toos and filling in as others blythly went elsewhere. I am now lying that I have completed things and spending great lengths of time dreaming of running away, even from those that I love. Inded it is those same people that have presumed upon me for much too ladder and expect that their choice is what will be and have never chosen the oppisite or picked up on one social clue.
I am terribly angry about the positions I have found myself in, even to today.
So I expect I will find myself here sharing as much of my art as possible and I am afraid that the dream of Mississippi Lake has to be posponed until after it is impossible for us to go anywhere.
I have this new little computer and I mean to learn how ro keep financials straight and a journal of what was accomplished and a calender of things to come.
This is venting for me. I am 53 years old and it iss time to take a sabatical for me.
Thanks for listening.
Yours J
2 comments:
Hang in there Janet. You are a gifted artist and I hear nothing but good things about what you have been creating. The problem with being a perfectionist is that it is hard to say 'done' and walk away. Don't be so hard on yourself. Artists are rarely recognized in their own lives, yet you have already built a happy customer base, not to mention a grant from the Arts Council. they don't just give those out to anyone, you know.
Need a break. Take one. Mississippi is calling to you and you will regret not going there. Pack only a few novels. Leave the projects astern and come back refreshed to start creating beauty once again. Love RBM
Hi Janet,
I'm so sorry to hear that you're experiencing such a tough time.
I hope that my commission of the two dolls hasn't in any way contributed to your stress. Please feel free to cancel the transaction and refund me if you need to take a break. I completely understand if you have to spend some time taking care of yourself and I definitely don't want to make you feel under pressure at all.
I truly hope you are able to rest up and find a happier new direction in your life.
Best wishes for a happier and healthier future,
Regards,
Ben Gebal (ben1980 @ Etsy)
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